Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Intention vs. Action

I was reminded not long ago,
that we judge people by their actions,
not their intentions.

We did not intend to cause fear in a weaker human being,
but we did behave in such a way to cause such fear.

We did not intend to draw attention to ourselves by our behavior,
but our actions betrayed our intentions.

We could recite incident after incident
where our intentions were misunderstood
because our actions belied our intentions.

The problem lies in the fact that even though we judge others
by their actions,
we ourselves want to be judged by our intentions.

"God knows my heart," we glibly say.

I read something in Gretchen Rubin's book,
"The Happiness Project."

She says we should cut people slack. She says,
"The "fundamental attribution error" is a psychological phenomenon
in which we tend to view other people's actions as reflections of their
characters and to overlook the power of situation to influence their actions,
whereas with ourselves,
we recognize the pressures of circumstance. When other people's cell phones
ring during a movie, it's because they're inconsiderate boors;
if my cell phone rings during a movie,
it's because I need to be able to take a call from the babysitter.

I tried to remember not to judge people harshly,
especially on the first or second encounter.
Their actions might not reveal their enduring character
but instead reflect some situation
they find themselves in.

Forbearance is a form of generosity.
....'Find explanations in charity'
is a more holy way of saying,
"cut people slack." "
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There are of course situations where devious actions
demand a guilty verdict
and one cannot show much mercy.

But there are other situations
when we can step into another's shoes,
and view their actions through the intents of their hearts.

It is then we are judging others
by the way we want to be judged.

It is then we are playing by the Golden Rule.

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